Yesterday when I asked those of you who follow this blog to let me know what kind of support you need, one woman asked me to write about how to respond to people who use their illness as an excuse to treat their family members badly. She wanted to know how to handle someone who has the ability to control his/her behavior but chooses to be angry, mean, selfish and controlling.
I was married to a man like. Obviously, I was a slow learner, because it took me 19 years to realize that he was NEVER going to change and that no matter how much I gave or how hard I tried to please him that I would never, ever be able to make him happy.
The book that helped me claim my independence and save my sanity was “Co-Dependent No More” by Melody Beattie. If you are tired of jumping through hoops trying to please someone who consistently makes you feel badly about yourself because you just can’t meet their expectations, buy this book today! It will teach you how to set boundaries and how to stop accepting the responsibility for other people’s feelings.
Also, I wrote an article for Griswold Home Care that was published last December. The title is “How to Care for a Cranky, Controlling, Manipulative Mom”. Click on the link below to read the article, and be sure to read the comments from readers at the bottom of the page.
If there are other areas where you need support as a caregiver, please let me know. Your input will help me help others.