Recognizing Caregivers
A Little Appreciation Goes a Long Way
There are caregiver recognition weeks and months, and sometimes there are awards given at banquets to a caregiver who has done something amazing, but when you’re in the trenches and caring for someone who has a chronic condition, it can feel like like the hardest, most thankless job you’ve ever done.
When I met my friend Ginny for breakfast recently and asked, “How’s Mike?” She shrugged and said, “So-so.”
I said, “I’m sorry. I know this is hard for both you and Mike.”
Quite forcefully she said, “Thank you! Thank you for recognizing that it’s hard for me too! Everybody always says, ‘Poor Mike! Poor Mike!’ No one ever stops to think that this is hard for me too! […]
One summer evening my husband and I enjoyed having dinner at a restaurant overlooking Tumwater Falls in the state of Washington. As I sat there and watched the river, I was mesmerized by how calm and still the water appeared on the surface – until the moment it fell over the edge. Then it crashed and splashed in a magnificent display of chaotic energy. 
When I spoke at a caregiving conference in Seattle, a woman shared a story with me that took my breath away. 
One day a young friend who cares for his grandmother said, “You need to tell people that caring for another person isn’t emasculating.” He has an cousin who doesn’t want people to know his job is caring for his mother. His wife is the primary wage earner, and he thinks being a caregiver isn’t very “manly”. 
It takes some time to adjust to life after caregiving, but as impossible as it seems, life will go on.
In today’s blog, I share the last letter my mother wrote before Dad died, and her powerful caregiver’s prayer.
